Inbody

So I’m back at Crossfit. Have been for about a month. I go 4x-5x week and I have personal programming this time-no group Wod for me unless I’m doing a partner wod with my husband on Saturdays. 

So why did I join back up to do something I have admittedly hated doing in the past? Well, a few reasons. One, it works. Two, and probably the biggest reason: my husband and I, after almost 17 years of marriage, have never shared a hobby.  And while this isn’t a “hobby” really, it’s a thing. A thing we’re both doing-maybe not together everyday but sometimes, we’re both doing it and have something to share and talk about and progress with together.  That’s a big deal to both of us. Three, I need discipline. Running alone had waned off for me and I just wasn’t doing any kind of exercise for a few months. Nobody was pushing me to do it either. And here I’m watching my husband kick his ass at CrossFit every day -while I’m over here gaining 10lbs for the holidays- and I’m like, I have to do something! And quick!

Sooooo, speaking of that 10lbs…. I’ve been avoiding the scale for months-which is crazy because I was so obsessed with it for a year-and just seeing that number on the inbody today was like reality check! Crap crap crap! 10lbs… I could kick my own ass for this… 

The inbody showed my BMI was at 29% though, which considering I was at 49% a little over a year ago is still something to be celebrated. I’m at 38% body fat so definitely want to get that number down. 

I need to lose another 35lbs. Which was right in line with goal weight to begin with. So right after Christmas (I must have some of moms potato soup on Christmas Day) I am back on post-op diet. No more carbs. Lots less sugars. Lot more water. Protein protein protein!

Speaking of protein, have you tried Juice Plus shakes? So so good! Mix in some Greek yogurt (which I loathe otherwise) and it’s a protein-packed meal right there. 

Updates a comin’ as I jump back on the wagon! Missed y’all!

  

The Stall from Hell

170. A number I have begun to LOATHE with all that is in me. 

Every. Single. Morning. 170 stares back up at me from the digits on my scale monitor. What are we on, like 2 months now?!

I happened to break it ONE day to 169.6 – I was elated! Literally danced around my bathroom like I just won the Power 5 or something. Yes, I finally broke the 170’s!!!  It lasted only that day. The next day I was 170.2 or some shit like that. Again. 

I’m elated that it’s not going up, for certain. But my body IS shifting itself around–weight is re-distributing itself WVERYWHERE. As an example, I find the top of my “back fat” is gone now but then I have a complete spare tire above my belly button now. It’s so weird. I don’t feel like I’m losing inches this month- I’m still in a perfect size 12. Not getting any looser or tighter. Just comfortable. Still in a medium top…I just want to lose 25 more pounds. 25! And I’m working so HARD! 

So I post this to whine, for sure, but to also show my fellow VSG-ers, stalls are very real.  You WILL have them.  And while they can be very discouraging, we (including me) MUST remember that we just have to keep rockin’ n Rollin’.  Our bodies will get there, maybe just not as fast as our minds want them to.

In the mean time, 170 can take a back seat to the 160’s – please and thank you. 

-Xoxo

Best Time Yet

So I just wanted to share a quickie tonight about my race this Saturday. I was thrilled with the fact that I made my best time yet! I still have a ways to go, but finishing the race in 38:23 is a HUGE leap from the 47+ minutes I was doing 6 months ago.  That’s serious progress to see, and was really what I needed this weekend. Because sometimes we look at our progress in too small of increments. When we take a look backwards, to see how far we’ve actually come, it can be such an awesome feeling of accomplishment!  So if you’re struggling with progress by the millimeters right now, take a look back at how far you’ve come since the start. And then give yourself a well-deserved pat on the back!

  

5 Month Sleevaversary 

I have mixed feelings about the numbers this month. Here are the stats:

  • HW: 240
  • Pre-surgery: -9.2
  • Month 1: -22
  • Month 2: -9.6
  • Month 3: -9.2
  • Month 4: -7.6
  • Month 5: -4.2
  • Total Loss To Date: -61.8

We all know the scale has been stuck for me this month, to my utter frustration! And we all know I’ve been off my game this month due to major stress and life events.  I shouldn’t be surprised at only a 4.2 loss – I guess I should be happy I lost any at all. But really, 4.2 lbs?! Plus I was really hoping I’d be in the 160’s by Vegas-which is 2 weeks away. *sigh* that’s not going to happen. 

The reason I have mixed emotions about this is because of my measurements. They came in surprisingly decent. I’ve lost a total of 7.5 inches this month alone. Here are my grand totals since surgery: 35.25 inches!!!

  
I feel smaller. Husband says I feel smaller too.  It’s SO hard not to compare myself to other sleevers, some are miles ahead of me at 5 months!

Ok, so I am not going to ho-hum anymore about the numbers, so I’ll just get on with just a couple NSV’s (not a whole lot since last post).

  • I’m wearing a lot of medium tops now like t-shirts and such. 
  • I think I’m in a 12 pants. Some are still pretty tight but others fit just fine. Depends on the brand, but I’m counting it!
  • My running has definitely gone up a notch since last month. I can run a whole 1.5 miles without having to stop and walk. And then I only have to walk a couple of minutes and can then run a 10 minute stretch again. My minute/mile run has improved by almost 3 minutes!
  • Work is going fabulous! Remember I changed careers last May…Seriously I’m doing so well I’m worried about falling off this mountain I’m on. But I’m totally focused, so I’ll just be staying right here, if you please. 

Goals for this month:

  • Meal planning. I must I must I must. 
  • Get back to tracking my nutrients in MFP. 
  • I have two 5ks before my 6mo surgaversary and I’m hoping to finish at least one of them at 40mins or less. (This may be ambitious).
  • I really need to start doing strength training again. I don’t go back to cross-fit until June so I have to get more diciplined in this area. Debating calling my personal trainer for sessions until then. It’s so expensive though…
  • 10+ lbs this month. 

I have a myriad of other goals for myself this month but these listed are specific to my WLS journey. I am really up for honing in on myself this month and for months to come. 2016 is the year of me! I hope for each of you it’s a year of you too!

Xoxo

Time to Train

Did I mention school is over? Yes well…

Guess what that means? Time to up my training game!  I’m doing a number of 5Ks over the next four months to make sure I stay nice and motivated (those entry fees add up!) So even if I only put in 2 miles one or two times a weeks I’m still making sure I’m getting 12-15 miles a week from here on. Started today with actually my best run yet. I think my yoga class last night made a difference today. 

I have to admit, I’m dreading it and am excited about it all at the same time. I only dread it now because I’m still not good at it. Not yet. But I will be. Mark my words, I’m going to get there darn it! I am going to run a 5k non stop by my mid-May race or I’m banned from Amazon for the rest of the year! Ha! (That’s serious incentive for me)

My scale is still stuck. I have stayed between 180.2-180.8 for three. full. weeks. I’m not truly freaking about it yet because I know my exercise has been so sporadic these last weeks.  So, now that I am focused on my running again and adding in the strength training, I know I’ll see that sucker start to move again in a week or so. If not, well I guess you’ll hear my angst then.  One thing I am worried about though is fitting into that one fabulous dress I bought for Vegas next month…

Here’s to a week full of NSV’s to all of us!!! 

The Impossible 

Hello! Hope everyone is enjoying a great weekend and have a day full of possibilities on this Sunday!  I like to wake up extra early on Sundays before the rest of the house, just so I can reflect and enjoy the quiet before church. 

I have to be in Vegas the Sunday after my birthday in March. So my husband I are going to fly in early together and make it a weekend getaway-which we haven’t had in eons. I’m so very excited! Work and my mom (she booked us a suite off the strip as my present) made it possible for us to do this. I’m so thankful! And did I mention excited? The one and only time I’ve been to Vegas I saw the inside of a convention center and then got the flu and spent, what was supposed to be a great weekend with my friends, instead on a mattress in a hotel room with 102+ fever. Blech! 

So I found this amazing dress online that I thought would be PERFECT for the first night on the town, in which we have already booked a night club tour.  (Which in itself is totally crazy to me because my husband is SO not a nightcluber!). I like to dance so I love them.  This is THE perfect dress! 

 

Isn’t this just gorgeous?!
 
I got the dress in the mail yesterday (so love Amazon) and tried it on last night.  It doesn’t quite fit. (Wha wha whaaam)

I was anticipating that it maybe wouldn’t fit now, maybe it would be a little too tight, but maybe by March it would be perfect.  I was able to wiggle it up my body but there was no way it was coming close to zipping up.  And I don’t know if another 25 lbs loss will be enough. Then I really got to thinking…25lbs?! Impossible!

When I started this journey I could not fathom the possibility that I would ever make it to goal weight. “100 lbs is never going to happen”. Not because I didn’t think I’d be successful, I totally thought/think I will be-I just couldn’t really conceive that 100lbs was…well, real.  All of the diets and working out before never got me anywhere but 20lbs maybe…and of course I would gain it back+.  It’s just a surreal thought that 100lbs was/is even a realistic possibility.  And even looking backwards on this last 4 1/2 months, -55 lbs is still like, “impossible” yet it IS real. So you would think that I could conceive of 25 more lbs easy, right? I’m staying on plan, working out and diligent about my training, yet I still feel like I’m lying to myself that another 25lbs is possible. Let alone by March!  Impossible. 

Why am I so programmed to think this way? Do/did anyone feel this way-like a healthier, slimmer you was even possible? “Of course it can happen, but how can that be possible?”  A contridiction of the thought patterns, for sure, but I can’t be the only one…right? <crickets>

Eyes on goal. That’s what I even said to a fellow blogger-just last night! I see the goal, but see a mountain in front of it that I just don’t have the experience needed to climb.  I am training for this climb. Eating, running, strength training… But apparently my brain hasn’t got the memo that I am already climbing this mountain. It seems as if I have some serious brain-speaking to do, and do it every day. 

It’s not impossible. It’s real and it IS possible.  And I’m doing it! Now.

My greatest point here is that physical changes are a side effect. Great ones. But the real mountain I think is the mental aspect of this journey. We all talk about that we can hardly recognize ourselves in the mirror, our skinny shadows, or are blown away by before and now pictures. Me included. And I wonder why each of us are so surprised by these things. We’re fighting for it every day! We are conquering what we thought was impossible. We need to fight with our minds too. We are winning and it’s time for our thoughts to catch up. 

It’s not impossible. Oh the possibilities when I truly live that mentality and it’s not a pep talk anymore….