Strength & Confidence

“Remember when we used to sit on our asses and smoke?”

That’s what one of my dearest friends said after a run in the park together a couple of weeks ago. I laughed my head off and still giggle everytime I think of it. Because it’s so true…We would sit on my front porch, yammering about everything while smoking our cigarettes. (I miss that house…but I digress…)

Wow, life is so different than it was then. So what happened next? Let me see….my husband went through two layoffs, I got laid off 6 months later, we started a business, lost our house, cars, and retirement, closed down the business, moved to a farm, started raising cattle (our new retirement plan), husband changed careers, I went back to school, almost got a divorce, started a new career… Whew! That’s my life for the past 6 years in a very breif nutshell.  Now that’s getting personal!

The point?

I look back at all of this – all of the pain, the turmoil, the stress, just the hurdles life has thrown in my path – and I look at myself in the eyes today. I. Am. Badass.  And I am PROUD of myself. I didn’t just survive these things, I fought the battles, and I conquered them.  Looking at where I’m standing today, I am holding the flipping gold metal!

I am not just rambling on to pat myself on the back to y’all. Thing is, I want to remember these things and hold them in my memory on purpose.  Lessons to learn, absolutely. But more than that, proof that I have the strength to overcome and persevere.  Self-confidence hasn’t been the easiest thing for me, like ever.  But reflecting on these things makes me realize I am strong. I should be confident in myself. I can look in the mirror and see pride.  So, as I look to kick off a new year tomorrow, I am going to remind myself of these things every day. I refuse to see failure in the mirror any. more.

I urge each of you to maybe do a little reflection of the obstacles you have likely overcome in your life as well. It’s enlightening – and dare I say liberating – to realize where your strength has guided your path, and maybe you don’t really realize it until you look back…

Don’t walk quietly into 2016. Jump for joy into it and make it the best year yet!

Happy New Year All and let’s do this – with no inhibitions and full of confidence!

A Brand New You, Effective Tomorrow

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Reflections and Resolutions

As I reflect on the year of 2015, I truly am blown away by all of the changes I have personally made in my life, in just this last year. Not in any particular order…I changed careers, I took control of my health and gave myself another tool so that I might finally be successful, I started this blog, and I took a focused look inward to realize my strengths and weaknesses to tackle what I need to celebrate and what I need to work on in the various aspects of my life.  I did good this year. All of the things I set out to do this year I did, and more. 

Now I have to admit, I met 2015 with a battered heart and a lack of faith in myself, really walking adrift and aimless at the beginning. For most of 2013 and all of 2014 my sole focus was on my marriage and keeping the kids oblivious to the turmoil. With the dust settled, doors closed, and new foundations being constructed by the end of 2014 I took a look in the mirror last New Year’s Eve and, while I was hopeful, I was damn tired. Drained. Like swimming in the ocean for months and months and finally making it to the shore, success!, but no more gas in the tank, know what I mean?  I didn’t have a plan for my personal goals and growth.  I couldn’t even tell you what those were. Yes I was in the middle of grad school but just pushing the paces to get me through until graduation.  

It wasn’t until February when I was sitting in a 3-day summit meeting at work when it hit me – dead in the face – what in the hell am I doing here? I hate this industry and there’s no where for me to grow or even do something different!  I made a plan then and there. I was going to bide my time, finish grad school, then go on the hunt for something inspiring and ideally from home. My kids are getting into their teenage years and my constant presence in their lives would be even more vital than ever before. A week later a job popped up in my LinkedIn profile bar, and it was with a company I desperately wanted to work for and had wanted to for 3 years.  I didn’t go lookin for it either-in my mind I wasn’t ready. But there it was, right in front of me. I took a chance and applied. 7 weeks and 5 interviews later I was offered a position with this company and I haven’t looked back. More money, I work from home, and the growth opportunities are endless. And I absolutely love what I do now and the company I work for. 

Meanwhile, I took a strong hold on my health. Diet and exercise, Crossfit, personal trainer, c25k, weight watchers, I was in the war zone – and losing. Discouraged and depressed I turned to food and self-sabotaged every effort I was making. But I didn’t stop the efforts, just obviously couldn’t break trough. I gained 40 lbs in 6 months. Enough was enough and VSG was going to help me win over depression and self-sabotage. I committed and was/am all in now. Best decision ever.  

I started this blog. Both to meet fellow WLS Angels and to keep myself accountable. A bonus would be if I helped others out in their journeys too. It’s been amazing so far, living my journey and sharing with others and becoming friends with people who understand just how hard this really is. 

Those are the highlights-the big stuff-and just know there were so many other changes in my life I was making too. 

So, when I look in the mirror on Thursday I ask myself what I will see. What will I do? What do I want and How will I do it?  I want answers and plans on Thuraday-a list and a plan. 

So what is your New Year’s resolution?  2016 has a whole host of changes coming my way-those that are already seen. Student loans, financial planning, the logistical stuff yes, but things that need to be tackled for sure. 

But what about the me part? I am a mom and a wife and I am not by any means a selfish person. But 2016 is going to be focused on me. Selfish? Maybe. But the better I make me, the better I am for those impacted by me.  

I bought a Passion Planner.  I oogled and googled and found the right one for me. I’m very excited about receiving it. It may not be here for a few weeks but the site allows you a free download so I printed the directions and a few weeks to get me started for when I get the book. And I am excited. I am looking deep to find my true passion.  I am making an action plan, that incorporates all of my life goals and tasks to make my way towards them into my daily routine. My New Year’s resolution? To diligently USE my planner everyday, to capture my thoughts and be accountable to my dreams and what I am doing to make them a reality. I won’t accomplish everything in one year,  I know, but at least will be driving the bus to a destination of my own design. 

No more aimless days of just getting through the logistics of daily life. I will walk with purpose. And I will have yet another tool in my Arsenal to help me get there. 

   
So what are your resolutions? Your passions? I’d really love to hear…